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love in the bronx

It’s over between us. No, no baby, it’s not you, it’s me.


A new relationship is maybe the most amazing feeling in the world.  EVER.  But before every new relationship begins, a previous relationship must end; and that can make anyone bitter.  However, knowing the right time to let go can help you through this turbulent transition.

Ever noticed those couples who break up, then get together two days later, then break up again, and back together a few days later?  Yeah. Don’t do that. Not only does it play with your emotions, but it annoys the hell out of your friends.  I would seriously suggest not calling it quits until you’re ready to never see the other person again.  Just stop it already.  Those kind of yo-yo relationships never end up working out anyway.  If there’s that much doubt, you shouldn’t be together.

So, how do you know if you should get involved or run away?

Remember that vision I talked about in the last post, where you’ve been and where you want to go?  Ask yourself, does this person fit the vision of my ideal future?  If not, then move on and try someone else.

Or you could always do what I do when I’m trying to determine if she’s a “great one”- The door test.


According to Sonny, this is the test, as he explains to Calogero in the movie A Bronx Tale:

Sonny:  “Alright, listen to me. You pull up right where she lives, right? Before  you get outta the car, you lock both doors. Then, get outta the car,  you walk over to her. You bring her over to the car. Dig out the key,  put it in the lock and open the door for her. Then you let her get in.  Then you close the door. Then you walk around the back of the car and  look through the rear window. If she doesn’t reach over and lift up that  button so that you can get in: dump her.”

Calogero:  “Just like that?”

Sonny:  “Listen to me, kid. If she doesn’t reach over and lift up that  button so that you can get in, that means she’s a selfish broad and all  you’re seeing is the tip of the iceberg. You dump her and you dump her  fast.”

Okay, so maybe the “door test” isn’t the most accurate anymore, especially with most cars now having automatic locks. But I think the point I was trying to make is that your best line of defense against nasty break-ups is proper screening.  In the movie they used the door test, but these days you’ll have to think of something much more practical.


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